Thank you!

These are one of the first words most kids are thought at the early age by the proud parents who twitch the hand or pet their kids head when they are given something by someone saying: “Brian, honey, what do we say?” Or “Say thank you sweetheart!”

Even though we are repeatedly thought the same lesson throughout our lives by our parents, family, teachers and later companies we work for – do we really say it when and to whom it matters? Do we really mean it?

This is a quit personal post, but this is after all my personal blog J this is to say thank you to hero ladies who made a significant impact in my life and shaped me into who I am today and who I am striving to become like.

TO MY GRANDMAS ….  Who were true ladies, hard working, classy and most fashionable women in town; both of them knew how to hold their families together by being a strong support to their husbands and gentle but determined hand which lead the family & steered each of the kids towards personal independence with no excuses. Thank you for creating a family full of strong, independent, successful and beautiful ladies. Thank you! RIP.

TO MY MOTHER … who taught me to march to my own drum no matter what, who showed me the power of forgiveness, who taught me to lead with my heart and never to settle with anything less than exactly what I deserve and who continuous to show me that impossible is nothing. From her I learned that love is an unselfish and honest gift with which you give your whole self, expecting nothing in return. She reminds me to keep a child in me alive and stay creative weather making a smiling scrambled egg for breakfast to my boyfriend or jumping head in into new assignment at work. Thank you!

TO MRS.DEB & MRS.JENN… You were my American mothers, sisters, friends and extended family. From you I learned that life brings diversity, that not all situations in life are black or white. You supported me when I was hurt, provided a true role model of successful and strong women, mothers and ladies. You taught me everything from how to cook peanut noodles to how to put on a diaper and how to dump a bad news boyfriend. Thank you!

TO MY LITTLE ANGELS…Julia & Meg, Carolyn & Patrick. You made me realize and experience that there is such thing as unconditional love. You make me proud every day as you are growing into incredibly talented and strong young women & a man and I think about you very, very often as you impacted my life tremendously. Thank you!

TO MY GIRLS….Anita, Iva, Maja, Tea, Armina, Matea….You cried, danced, drank, fought, painted furniture, cooked, got in trouble, partied hard,  made mistakes, studied, worked out, together with me & you are still doing it. You are my kick in the butt when I need it, my favorite coffee dates, my long night calls, my book club and my support system. Thank you!

Who did you say thank you today lovelies? Don’t assume they know it.

"If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is 

'thank you', it will be enough." 

~ Meister Eckhart~

Lesson learned...

Today I remembered a girl I wrote a post about several months ago. She was tough from the outside but scared and alone from the inside. 

She still had her childish naiveness about her than, the goofiness and that naughty smile - although it was overpowered at a time with fear and loneliness of the situation she was in which went from excitement to fear, and than back to greatest happiness and love, and then back to the worst kind of pain and a heartbreak. 

This girl was a tough cookie, used to do all sorts of stupid things like: wrote love notes on post-its and sprinkled rose petals for a romantic evening, she worked hard and kept smile on her face all the time, loved to joke around and race down the street in heels, sang under the shower and walked around like a crazy person in the morning, more than anything else - she believed in true love and honesty, she put her 100% in it. But it wasn't enough.

I don't remember the last time I saw her. I heard she is doing really well. She still works a lot. She is still strong. There is a great looking guy who likes her and she just goes with a flow, maybe she gets married...without giving her heart in it. There is another guy who she likes - who is definitely a heartbreak potential. 


 If you look at her closely these days, you might notice that naughty spark in her smile once in a while, although she doesn't smile much anymore and is scared to ever take that chance again.
       
She gave up on believing in love, I guess this is the time of growing up when you realize that painful fact that relationships and marriage are just norms and expectations of the society and have nothing to do with lifetime long love and faithfulness. Just like you painfully realize that Santa never really existed and that when somebody dies, you will never see that person again. 


Hopefully...maybe...some day...somebody....
                                                          ...will prove her wrong...and she will be her kooky self again. 


Xoxo,


Kat

" I don't hate you. I am just disappointed you turned into everything you said you'd never be." 

Who is your pillar?

Today I started thinking about pillars, about my pillars. So I asked Google to ask Webster how to define a pillar. Webster defined pillar as:
1pil·lar
Pronunciation:
\pi-ler\
Function:
noun
1 a: a firm upright support for a superstructure : post b: a usually ornamental column or shaft ; especially : one standing alone for a monument
2 a: a supporting, integral, or upstanding member or part
3: a solid mass of coal, rock, or ore left standing to support a mine roof4: a body part that resembles a column

Okey…So having Webster confirm my theory I started to think of who/what is my pillar, my post, my column, my leader, my support, my base, my tower of strength…who or what is my rock?!

Once we are born we need a lot of nurture but not as much support, in our childhood we grow and develop on one firm, safe and solid pillar of our family. As we grow that pillar is not sufficient, our knowledge, curiosity and ambitions are growing as are we, this is when standing on only one (although strong and basic) pillar becomes insufficient, unstable and it limits the growth of our potential. This is when we self grow an additional pillar - we build friendships. This pillar is getting taller and stronger, with years it chips away one bit and grows by a two, but it mostly measures continuous growth.
Ok. So here we are, standing on the two strong pillars, balanced and steady, tall and strong. Next, we learn and grow more, we get wider and wider, want to keep growing and explore the life further. Slowly, we are stretching a bit much, our appetite and our needs grow, we become more confident and ambitiously wanting to grow a whole new unfamiliar pillar from the scratch.
Sometimes this means we are jeopardizing or just shaking up our two base posts, but we are adamant to do it and we try. It is scary, unfamiliar and new but we risk it and start building it.
We make a choice of a material we build it from, on its height and its position in regards to our base. But once we start building it we can’t stop until we finish it, because as we started to build it we have moved our core - our equilibrium, and we are not going to be balanced until it is finished. Each of us has to make one from the scratch sooner or later; the only difference is in the amount of the risk and the speed one is willing to take while building it.
There is one more pillar we build out of ambition, social expectations and necessity, this pillar is our work, career, our status…it is our desire to prove oneself in a certain discipline, prove oneself to society and to ourselves. This pillar is really just a mean to maintain a steady pace while building a whole new one, it is made of sand, we build it up much easier and faster than any other but it is also most fragile, even a breeze can blow it away, not to mention the earthquake!
…the one we build all by ourselves, from the scratch is always high risk and requires a whole lot of investment and promises nothing and gives everything- this is the pillar of love, relationship and later family…the pillar which you must build sooner or later…..its quality and endurance depends on a person you are building it with, material you are using and care you are maintaining it with. This is the pillar which will replace your base- the pillar of your family, once it naturally fades away.
Did you build your pillar? Or did you start building it, got scared, stopped and only thing you have left is the pillar made of sand? If this is the case, my dear you are a sinking Venezia.

~Kat