Victor de Souza - fashion virtuoso!

   During recently finished Dreft Fashion Week Zagreb I had a pleasure to meet Mr.Victor de Souza and his young and creative team. Other than tremendous talent and obvious endless passion Victor has in his creative expression, for the short time I had a chance to spend with him partying in clubs in Zagreb I must say I was most impressed with his adorable personality, childlike appeal, modesty and friendly character which is why I felt instant fondness and bond with him, which is really unusual for people working in such a busy, competitive and sometimes shallow industry - Victor is just the opposite, with having special sensibility for corporate responsibility and giving back to the community.

Victor's creative, positive and driven team seems to have the right vision in mind when it comes to developing his name and his brand. With such a great celebrity following and larger than life personality, sky is the limit.

Other than being recognized by many celebrities Victor's fabulous pieces appeared on many best magazine covers: Italian Vogue, Amica, Prim Mag, Numero etc.

Last week in Zagreb on Dreft Fashion Week Zagreb we had the opportunity to see his romantic and sensual ready to wear collection for SS 2011. with couture detailing. The collection was made out of 24 evening wear pieces in wide range color pallet and variety of feminine siluetes of architectural design with comprehensive shoulder detailing - a modern dream of every fierce fashionista who is strong with her own view of the world but is also very gentle and passionate in her expression.

                   

"Victor De Souza has totally shocked us!"

Coco Perez, blogger 

"I was not interested in fashion before, but now I am!"

Jessica Biel (after seeing Victor's show)

Splitting up in Split

The undercover geek that I am, whenever I fail to verbally express the emotion residing in my PMS-al self, I consult the charming old, Mr. Know-It-All Webster, so he said:

Inflected Form(s): split; split·ting

Pronunciation: \ˈsplit\

Function: verb

1 a : to divide lengthwise usually along a grain or seam or by layers  

b : to affect as if by breaking up or tearing apart 
2 : to divide into parts or portions: as 

a : to divide between persons

b : to divide into factions, parties, or group

Once I read the definition above painful "Auchh" slipt down my lips automatically. To be honest with you, with all due respect to my PMS feelings. Spending the weekend in Split was nothing I was afraid it might be, it was quit lovely actually.

My hotness friend surprised me and picked me up from the airport, we spent most of the day walking around, catching up and drinking coffee. Once he left to go to basketball practice I walked around a bit on my own, many things did brought back the memories of my ex, but everything seemed so distant now. I finally realized that now, somewhere he was not the same person who I used to know and loved anymore. 

I was not sad at all.


 I smiled, passing by the cafe we first met last summer at pretending to be cool and totally over each other, while couldn't wait to rip each others clothes of first moment we got, as it happened later in the day. 


At that very second, I missed everything about him, the smell, his messy hair,his stupid jokes, the gap in between his teeth, the nasty comments unique to him only, which at a time I found adorable. 


Then the reality hit me and I remembered that that guy no longer exists. He stayed frozen in time in July,2009. in Split, and shall remain there forever, I still fondly remember that man,love him and always will.

    I also did a bit of a vintage shopping and exploring, I got a really cute pair of shoes and a bracelet imported from Mexico. When I got hungry I stopped at a super cute home made Nadalina Chocolate shop with specialty chocolates as: olive oil chocolate, orange peel covered chocolate, lavender cream chocolate, aphrodisiac chili peppers chocolate etc. I got one of each, ouu yes I did! 

When my friend Armina arrived we had a fancy dinner and got a lot of attention from men and boys walking down the street. Sadly, many stores were closed on Sunday so we went street art browsing and met many interesting new locals.

We walked around a lot, took many pictures and really tried to let go of all the pressures waiting for us back in our offices at home. The weather was great and we enjoyed doing absolutely nothing, sitting around, sipping coffee, eating croissants and commenting on the way people passing by are dressed. It seems to be the favorite thing to do of the locals.

Two of us would not be as fabulous as we are if we haven't spotted fabulous and flashy things all around us, so we have seen a Karl Lagerfeld look-alike passing by, we found fabulous floral dress shop when we got lost in one of the "space for one person at a time" streets, and last but not least we have seen fabulous shoes I wanted to break in the closed store to get to.

Armina took some good pictures and could not help but criticize my amateur frames when I attempted to play the photographer role, as she also absolutely loves to have photos taken of her. 

On the other hand, my basketball friend was happy to see us and he enjoyed the show and all the commotion around us :) We had another delicious sea food dinner and went out for some drinks.

All in all, we had a lovely time! We managed to relax, gossip, we got our fashion fix for the week and I think I finally managed to split it and let go in Split! 

Xoxo,

          Kat

.....I am beginning to think, I imagined you all along....

Recession in fashion - Dress for less

Economize
Dictionary: e·con·o·mize (ĭ-kŏn'ə-mīz')
1.To practice economy, as by avoiding waste or reducing expenditures.
2.To make economical use of something



Right, Webster was a really smart fellow. I am not so sure that he was a fine dresser. Anyhow, one thing is for sure, recession is hitting us on all fields, so is the case with dressing and shopping. Does this mean we should stop spending money on clothes, shoes and make up?



Of course NOT!!! It is very important to continue to stimulate economy by continuous input of fresh cash. In short, by spending, you are actually helping general bad state of the economy.However, the key is, spend less than what you earn. It does sound simple, but it is the hardest thing for people to learn. I am the prime example.



Now, the current state in retail is seemingly very beneficial for the consumer, right? Sales everywhere! This however encourages you to shop for things that are cheap, not those that you necessarily need or are of a good quality. Basically with the economic situation as it is, you simply cannot afford to buy cheap stuff. You are looking for good quality pieces that are timeless and fit your personality.



So we could have seen on Paris, New York and Milan Fashion Weeks for Fall 2009. your timeless dark and light grays, blacks, browns, beiges all were spiced up with zippers, shoulder pads, big chunky statement industrial jewelry , tie high boots, lather pants, sequins, men shoes, interesting head pieces etc. Designers could not afford to make cheap and weak collections.



Cost saving was definitely noticeable, but not in a bad way. In contrary, many designers showed their strength by going back to their roots and covering basics.

Gareth Pugh did a video fashion show which showed fashion pieces and fabrics in a whole new dimension.
Botega Veneta did many feminine value added pieces: white coats, great detailing, low back dresses.
Marni focused on investment pieces as well, he did great fur coats and peacoats, short skirts, huge chunky jewelry and line chain necklaces.
Angelo Missioni had a vision of ice princess who wore layered cardigans, light and delicate lace pieces in pale pink and baby blue armored with huge chunky knits.

My favorites were:
Zac Posen - Zac's story happened in Paris in 1920's Patty Smith era, he did gorgeous silk dresses and suites in pale pink and gold. His message to women was to create their goddess existence.
Ana Sui did not disappoint, her collection was of course colorful, hippy, feminine and gothic-cool, she used feathers and designed some great head pieces.
I loved Alex Wang's rock and roll minimalistic look. Alex did leather pants and tailored jackets, great texture and finishing in black and white, beading with bras-nickel metals, beautiful purple dresses and great sequin hoods and hats.
I also loved Oscar de la Renta's gowns, smokey eyes, duchess hair puffs kind of look and wool-fur combinations in red, orange, blue and purple.
Donna Karan created gorgeous gowns and skirts by cutting and draping, these easy and flexible pieces came in purple, red, burgundy and blue.

Of the chart were my top favorites "beyond fashion" designers:

Galliano for Dior - with Ukrainian virgin bride muse who wore coin necklaces, gray, silver green and red pieces - see-through silk pants and wide and long sleeve dresses with gorgeous beading.
Ana McGibons made a great collection for Chloe, great capes, rolled up pants, black velvet overalls, military colors, tall shorts, oversized coats and a special beige sleeveless dress with high neck.
McQueen did a very strong collection - colorful tights, long skirts and coats, great hats, all in red, white and black, very fetish, fierce and gothic.
While Karl Lagerfeld for Chanel did super cool retro hats, deep V front tops in black, white, jade green and pale pink, body suites, high neck and half sleeve.

In conclusion, try to pull the inspiration out of next seasons designer pieces, pay attention to details and invest in timeless pieces which are always in style.
Luckily, many spring items are still in, like harem pants which just got sequin detailing for fall, chunky jewelry and zippers are back, red lips and high tie boots are still in-style from last fall. Please note that shoulder pads are optional trend worth of passing.

Let the recession inspire you to recreate, reuse, shop for vintage pieces, go through your grandma's closet or simply organize a little yard sale or trade among your girlfriends with stuff you grew out of or were given and it doesn’t fit your personality.
If you are a designer wearing girl, you can now get the designer jewelry for less: Erickson Beamon did jewelry collection for Target, in Croatia Leonarda Boban did a cute jewelry collection for Kozmo drug stores, so there is something there for every budget.

Get inspired!

xoxo

Ouuu boy

So, here it goes...I met somebody...of course, didn't have a clue, did not want it and didn't expect it. He is not even my type! Never thought I could fall for somebody like that, and I did not, yet...but I can't stop thinking about him. There is something so cool, so hard to describe, and so normal about him. He is at the same time so strong and so vulnerable.

However, there is a catch, actually two. The first catch is that it is more wrong than right....actually it is totally wrong...so wrong I should not even talk to him anymore. Second catch is that he knows my ex, so this should be an automatic No-No... he is very like my ex, but more mature, brave and macho. He is very successful, strong, intelligent and intriguing....actually he is all my ex wanted to be but could not..hmm…that is just wird how karma works,ha?

But I should not even dare...I know I should not; I should not dare to think that something might happen here. We talked for hours, it really feels good to be around him, I am a different person now, more calm and more careful....I don't believe in love anymore...Or do I?

xoxo,

live from cloud nine...Kat

I SPY: Warsaw, Poland.

May 9th


I came to Warsaw yesterday morning, I could totally live here its gorgeously European. I went to fancy 50th birthday party last night and met many amazing, young and very successful people who were radiant with class and very intelligent.


We (Ania, Ana and I) came home from clubbing at 5 am, the party was super wild, we danced all night long, ate wonderful food and drank pink champagne and wine, we socialized with young but worldly people and were catching up on stories since the last time we saw each other past Christmas in NYC, gosh I missed this kind of European people living in US.


May 10th


My ladies and I spent the whole day walking through beautiful historic parks, we tried to catch a duck (didn't happened, did you know that ducks can be super aggressive? Hmm...I didn't know until this weekend hihi) After the walk in the park we had lunch at this wonderful Thai restaurant and had a quality girl-business talk in one super trendy cafe which reminded me on Panera Bread with its choice of pastries and a homie warm feel and on a Starbucks with its selection of coffees and other warm beverages from all around the world. I had a peppermint mocha and a piece of chilly and cherry chocolate cake, I know it sounds as a weird combo but the cake was divine! I promise!







We are just getting ready for another night on the town, I am wearing my hot sequin dress to test it for my next monday performance. Did I mention that I am going to a dance class and have a dance performance next week? I probably did not. Well I am very excited about my performance. As it seems I am somewhat talented dancer ( so my dance teacher thinks and my body moves well, so she saids , read: I dont fall over my own leg hihihihi)
Tonight we decided to first go for a small supper and than to rock couple of the hottest Polish clubs.
More details tommorow...time to do my hair.


May 11th


We had so much fun last night, we went to couple of sexy,trendy clubs and had a great girls night out. First spot was an underground fancy club with arch shaped hallways and private rooms. We didn't feel like dancing among the bunch of people on the packed dance floor so some gentleman invited us to with a glass wall divided VIP room where there was a private party, which soon cleared out so we stayed with the DJ and some boys, smoking Hooka and drinking Moet and Dom Perignon, I had my Mojito. It was lovely.











May 13th


Dog status: Roko is still limping. That is what he gets for jumping on every female dog (for the lack of more appropriate expression), he should have not pick the engaged female dog LOL.


Driving status: Working with my 3rd instructor. I was wearing heels and by accident hit the table of the outdoor cafe , nobody was hurt, luckily. Not sure why driving instructor was so mad, gosh... Looks like I have to find yet another one. Lesson learned: do not drive in blue flower sandals EVER again, the heel wont stick down.
Note to myself: try white wedge Ann Klein heels tomorrow, they said it will be sunny.


Love status: Today something clicked in my head. I cried my last tier. I met somebody by accident. This guy is a real man. He is a very successful and attractive man.
I never met anybody like this. Its weird. I don't know what to think.


More in next post.


Kat

Who is your pillar?

Today I started thinking about pillars, about my pillars. So I asked Google to ask Webster how to define a pillar. Webster defined pillar as:
1pil·lar
Pronunciation:
\pi-ler\
Function:
noun
1 a: a firm upright support for a superstructure : post b: a usually ornamental column or shaft ; especially : one standing alone for a monument
2 a: a supporting, integral, or upstanding member or part
3: a solid mass of coal, rock, or ore left standing to support a mine roof4: a body part that resembles a column

Okey…So having Webster confirm my theory I started to think of who/what is my pillar, my post, my column, my leader, my support, my base, my tower of strength…who or what is my rock?!

Once we are born we need a lot of nurture but not as much support, in our childhood we grow and develop on one firm, safe and solid pillar of our family. As we grow that pillar is not sufficient, our knowledge, curiosity and ambitions are growing as are we, this is when standing on only one (although strong and basic) pillar becomes insufficient, unstable and it limits the growth of our potential. This is when we self grow an additional pillar - we build friendships. This pillar is getting taller and stronger, with years it chips away one bit and grows by a two, but it mostly measures continuous growth.
Ok. So here we are, standing on the two strong pillars, balanced and steady, tall and strong. Next, we learn and grow more, we get wider and wider, want to keep growing and explore the life further. Slowly, we are stretching a bit much, our appetite and our needs grow, we become more confident and ambitiously wanting to grow a whole new unfamiliar pillar from the scratch.
Sometimes this means we are jeopardizing or just shaking up our two base posts, but we are adamant to do it and we try. It is scary, unfamiliar and new but we risk it and start building it.
We make a choice of a material we build it from, on its height and its position in regards to our base. But once we start building it we can’t stop until we finish it, because as we started to build it we have moved our core - our equilibrium, and we are not going to be balanced until it is finished. Each of us has to make one from the scratch sooner or later; the only difference is in the amount of the risk and the speed one is willing to take while building it.
There is one more pillar we build out of ambition, social expectations and necessity, this pillar is our work, career, our status…it is our desire to prove oneself in a certain discipline, prove oneself to society and to ourselves. This pillar is really just a mean to maintain a steady pace while building a whole new one, it is made of sand, we build it up much easier and faster than any other but it is also most fragile, even a breeze can blow it away, not to mention the earthquake!
…the one we build all by ourselves, from the scratch is always high risk and requires a whole lot of investment and promises nothing and gives everything- this is the pillar of love, relationship and later family…the pillar which you must build sooner or later…..its quality and endurance depends on a person you are building it with, material you are using and care you are maintaining it with. This is the pillar which will replace your base- the pillar of your family, once it naturally fades away.
Did you build your pillar? Or did you start building it, got scared, stopped and only thing you have left is the pillar made of sand? If this is the case, my dear you are a sinking Venezia.

~Kat

Big Apple for Xmass

Finally it is here! Since early this summer I have patiently counting the hours, crossing out the days and ripping out the month pages on my fancy Paris calendar and finally there it came –the December! The picture on the page was of the Eiffel tower with a young couple kissing right under it and snow all around them…all over the part of the page where the days are marked I wrote: "2 weeks with Ante! Yaaaay! (with little hearts all around it)"ouhh I can't even tell you how eager I was for the 20th of December to finally come!

Work was stressful, I traveled some, had a lot of deadlines but I did everything fast thinking, if I hurry up, the days would go by faster as well. The anticipation was growing, I slept through weekends, the number of my weekly visits to the gym at least tripled, I waxed my legs and endured excruciating pain, did my nails, went tanning regularly and was completely packed a week ahead of time, all wishing to finally, finally spend some long waited and definitely much deserved time with my boyfriend. Two whole weeks, I thought! Days and nights- just a two of us! Yaaaay, heaven!


It is so weird how until you loose this privilege, of spending every night in the bed with the person you love, you are not even aware of what you are missing....until it is gone.


So, on the day of the flight I was particularly wired, and I didn’t even had coffee. I was scared of how am I going to feel when I see him, eager to kiss him all over, wondering if he will think I changed…a lot of things went through my head. Luckily, both of my flights were on time and other that somebody's freaking luggage falling from the damn overhead compartment on my head and cutting me right by my eye, everything else was fine. Can you believe that they said I cant even sue anybody for that?! But seriously, I was bleeding and the rude stewardess said there is nobody for me to sue! I said, "Come on! At least let me sue the airline!" Anyways, no scare, so I guess it is whatever.


All in all, I had a lot of fun on my two weeks vacation, it was challenging and all considering the whole situation, with my boyfriends mum being with us and all of my questions I had going there remained unanswered. Especially the big one, how long this whole long distance thing will last…but I did realize that I am the one who is able to decide on that as well, so I do have power as well, and I also got to know my boyfriend better in different situations. We fought and discussed our open ended discussion in circles, I cried and felt mislead, I felt as if he has been playing with me this whole time, we had fun and lought, in fact, spending time with him this past two weeks I laugh more than even before, he made me laugh so hard I cried, we both did.

We played games walking to movies and he hauled like a wolf walking down the street, while I was jumping around and dancing around him. It felt amazing waking up next to him every morning, and we kept our routine of me frantically half a sleep smacking all three alarm clocks and him grabbing my hands trying to stop me and hugging me to go back to sleep.


We are a great couple, him and I, we both work hard, have the same aspirations for the future (dog Duje, kids and all) and are equally afraid of getting hurt, but the good thing is that we also still both believe, and trust we will make it through all of this and make all of our dreams eventually come true.


He is truly caring, honest, respectful and getting more relaxed with me as time goes by, so this time being away from one another hasn’t damaged us as much as I expected it would. I still love him, even more than ever, I certainly admire his persistence and motivation, have more understanding for his needs, but I also trust he will make a right decision once the time for him comes to. I to might decide to take a different route, but one thing I know for sure, this man is worth of waiting for, and if we for some reason do not work out as a couple, I would always want him to stay a part of my life, because he does complete me, he makes me happy every second I spend with him and I do hope for a chance to give it a try on a real life with him.


Leaving NY I felt my soul detaching from my body on that airport and my heart going right with it, running after him and grabbing his hand, while my body continued with tears rolling down my face through the check in, and into the plain. It was hard, it still is, but we will make it.


Happy and better New 2009.Year to you all!




Xoxo,


Kat

Appetite for Love

When it comes to love I am like a child who, no matter the age refuses to believe that Santa is not real. The kind of person who thinks love lasts forever and who believes that there is only one perfect person for you in this world and if you are one of the lucky ones and you find your prince/princess charming, you better hold them tight and treat them good. I am the one who finds purpose of existence in love and passion.


Here I am not talking only about romantic love, although that one is on the very top of them all, here I am primarily talking about having love and passion for everything in life: the work you do, your family, your pet, your garden, your car etc. Whatever it is that makes your heart skips a beat and speeds up your blood flow, whatever makes you blush and puts the smile on your face when you get up in the morning feeling on top of the world.


See, first thing I do in the morning, with my eyes still closed and very, very disoriented I look for him, for him who I consider to be The One. I tap with one hand and look for his hand, chest, face...than I open one eye and realize he is not even there, just an empty pillow.... than I sink my head into mine and get upset and don't feel like waking up at all, which is usually followed with beating on my alarm clock or cell phone, again tap, tap with the same right hand from the elbow just stronger and angrier, once its silenced or broken I turn around to sleep some more.


I notice when leafs on the tree by my house are still golden brown and green even though its November, I notice if the person who I always see on the bus stop in the morning is not there anymore and I wonder if he is sick or maybe just slept in. Sometimes I look at the peoples faces on the bus, in the tram, walking down the street and wonder where are they going and who is waiting for them at home. I can tell by their eyes that they are tired, worried, sad, hopeless and wonder why...the creepy as it sounds this starts of my train of thoughts and leads my thinking into completely different direction, I reflect myself of it. I use those people as mirrors.


Looks like I am emotionally old school while physically and spiritually liberal, or just rather observant. It is hard to tell. One thing I know for a fact is that I have a strong appetite for love, while some have strong appetite for money or success, the way I think these have to be balanced, cause if you only crave for money and success than you will become money obese and love hungry and die, and nobody wants to die. :)


Xoxo,


Kat

Fresh Post

It was a while since I have written a fresh post, since than I have landed a new grown up and responsible job position. Position is very promising in terms of career growth and pay. Great! So what’s missing?

Well, New York is missing that is what. Here I don’t mean a City. When I say New York is missing than I mean: glam, posh people, Rugby crew, rush, Skim Peppermint Mocha, Ante and I on a boat ride around Manhattan or in the bed being lazy on Sunday afternoon in Astoria. Ahhh….

Once again I am faced with the long distance curse, it is going on and on and on….will it ever end? I sure hope so. I am in “Dangerously in Love” mood and my friends Armina and Anita are suggesting thinking “Me, Myself and I”…and I am trying to find a balance.

When it comes to balance I feel like one thing that would help to achieve it, is to do a detailed clean up in a social department. This means to prioritize and appreciate more my own precious time, and choose whom to give it to. This is how I see it. We all are given one little, short life to live. In this short life we are given a full freedom to use it to the best of our imagination and ability.

Most of us get so absorbed with what is society (family, friends, community, neighbors...) expecting from us to do or who to be, that we are loosing the power of critical thinking and creativity, we stop questioning what is really what we want from our life and who we really want to be. Next, we compromise and accept less than what was originally planned. This, my friends leads to becoming – ordinary. In the fashion lingo: little black dress, red lipstick and pearls = very Coco Chanel, classic but unique, just a black dress = boring and ordinary.

Now, one would ask, what is wrong with being ordinary…living a decent life, accepting the average job, average salary, average apartment, boyfriend or husband and just blend in with the rest of the ordinaries.

The wrong thing is that we can choose to be unique individual, not to compromise, not to take the easy way out, follow our instinct and take risks, to speak our mind and live or lives to the fullest! Of course this second choice comes with gazillion con's (heartbreaks, investment losses, disappointments etc.) but it makes one achieve his/hers full potential!

This way you live your life and are not just an observer standing in your own safe corner and doing your routine tasks, day after day, after day.

The One

Today is a holiday in Croatia, it is the day when we celebrate the dead, visit their graves, light candles and bring fresh flowers. I lost a lot of people in my life way to early, they died. Yesterday I lost another person, I think I lost him a while ago but just found out yesterday. I lost my boyfriend.


After waiting and waiting, loving and hoping he gave up on us, just like that, the investment was not worth of return, or no ROI (for those of you who measure everything in life in $ value). Now, I am sad, mad, disappointed, hurt, feel rejected and in pain, I am crying randomly and feel lost. I feel like he abandoned me. My heart is broken. With all that being sad one would expect me to now trash him and explain what a lousy and cowardly person he is, low values, no heart, that he is nobody. However, I can't and don't want to do that. That would not be true. He is none of those things and I still love him endlessly.


Talking to my true friends who stayed with me through everything I realized some things about myself and the relationship I had. I am not a quitter, I am very romantic and believe in love and fighting for it, I am probably living in the wrong age. Love and passion are included in all of what I do. My work, my relationship with friends, family and most importantly in my romantic relationship. I fight and love passionately.


High drama? Maybe, but it is a lot of fun and also very painful to live like that, but guess what, you feel alive and you do live to the fullest! Most importantly, you can always look at everybody's face and never feel ashamed cause at all times you gave your all!


I refuse to take the easy way out and just give up but I do believe in letting go. A very smart person once said: „Let go what you love the most, set it free, if it comes back than it is yours forever and if it doesn't than you never really had it“ .
This time I did let him go because I believe that I deserve to be with somebody who is a good passionate man with strong values, somebody confident and brave, with goals in life which are not measured in $ or Ł but in accomplishments, memories and emotions. And he, he needs to find out who he really is and what he really wants, and maybe once he will even realize who he had and lost.


And me? What's going to happen with me? I am not sure. I know I can jump on the next chance with a man willing to be my shoulder to cry on tomorrow if I wanted to. But after this relationship, which I thought to be my last one, I have to many pieces to gather and feel as if I will be busy with that for a long time.


There are to many memories, silly things that remind me of him: his jeans by my bed, a package of little presents I put together to sent to him, a calendar where I was counting the days until I go to NY for Christmas and finally see him, the travel papers and passport, our song on my Ipod, the bracelet he got me and the picture of us on my laptop.
While the worse are the memories in my head which are impossible to put in the box and push to the bottom of the closet. Our first Christmas together, our „official“ anniversary on the New Years Eve, the cruise around Manhattan, stupid thing he said when he first kissed me, watching movies and being lazy on the beach, the Valentines day with rose petals and candles, dinners in the City, waiting for him for hours to come from work and sleeping on his chest, talking and drawing to each other on the webcam for hours at night, talking about our future, our apartment and having babies, this will all be hard to let go and forget.


If I ever do find a man who will be strong enough not to feel intimidated by me, who knows how to and is not afraid to deal with all the challenges which relationship and life bring, I know I will be able to give my all to him, and hope he would take my bruised up heart.


Kat :(

Au Revoir New York

Zagreb, Croatia
Rainy, not at all summer like day...
I wonder what is the weather like in New York City...hm...
Ouu well... I'm back here in Croatia, it is my 7Th day back and I am still keeping myself isolated from my friends and most of my family members under the excuse of a terribly contagious cold, which I self diagnosed as a strep throat, so that makes me highly contagious and avoiding people for their own good is indeed a good idea.

Don't get me wrong, my throat really hurts, and I feel awful, but there is also that other thing, this feeling of "unreadiness" to face people and adapt back to the culture I do not live in for a five years now. I am not quit sure if I am scared of not meeting people´s expectation of what I should be after graduating college and living abroad or am I afraid of them judging me for who I become and being jealous .Hmm...

It is time for another glass or Chocolate Mint Baileys. (No I am not an alcoholic, I just had an hour long conversation with "Ouu so lovely" customer service representative from Sprint who informed me of $300 unexpected fees to be paid, by me! Yesterday! Of course, that´s not going to happened, for that money I can get solid sale sandals in Saks.)

OK, I am back. Moving on. I think I am going to meet my home girls for a drink tomorrow and face them bravely and just smile, can´t go wrong with smiling and listening. That is what I am going to do, I am going to just listen and keep my answers short and sweet, nobody disappointed and nobody jealous! Voila!

This past weekend my boyfriend was visiting from London. That totally made my weekend, my week, it made me smile. He is one of those rare people that just know what other person is feeling and has a calming effect without clowning or trying to hard. We spend the whole day in cafes, high school reminiscence sandwich joints and popular city ice cream place.

While we were waiting for a tram on Croatian main square to go back home I could not help but notice that Croatian man carry purses. All of them! All these macho man that act like hooligans during soccer games, strong and protective toward women, never cry, never hurt and never bleed, but, they do daily,get in touch with their feminine side and carry PURSES. No, no, they are not wallet holders, key pouches nor fanny packs, they are PURSES. I mean, there is nothing wrong with a good man-purse. I am sure it makes perfect sense to carry one and that it is very functional and practical, I mean I carry one and love it, but I am also a girl. I just could not but find the irony in the sight of a six foot five man with a purse.

Anybody that knows the reputation of Croatian man as well as their average built must surely see some irony in the fact that they are becoming increasingly metro sexual and refreshingly open with it. This must be progress from "women´s place is in the kitchen" and "women are cooking, cleaning and child bearing machines while man are out hunting for food" kind of views.

Lastly, even though I am perfectly OK and in favor of this new breed of Croatian man that are not afraid to show their feelings and care more about their looks I will not be shopping for a man-purse in early August for Ante´s birthday.

Pusa.
~Kat